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The Pentium PC
lyrics 2001 by Dr. H. Paul Shuch
sung to the tune of "The Golden Vanity" (traditional)

click to hear melody Click on the speaker icon to hear this melody

Oh, there is a mighty chip, and she powers my PC.
And the name of this chip is the Pentium rev. 3.
But I fear we have been taken by the Intel enemy,
For she's optimized for windows, windows, windows
Upon the screen of my PC.

Throwing numbers overboard the first Pentium PC,
Well, they wouldn't even float, and that's the point, you see.
They insist that's been corrected in the Pentium rev. 3
Even though she's running windows, windows, windows
Numerically on my PC.

Then up stepped Billy Gates, worth about a zillion three,
And he said "Hey, sucker, what will you give to me
If I steal a new OS for your Pentium PC?"
I said, "nothing if it's windows, windows, windows.
No more of you on my PC."

Now Intel has my silver, and Microsoft my gold
So my son and my daughter can each have a PC.
And their laptops may be light, but they still fail to delight,
For they all are running windows, windows, windows,
The virus on each new PC.

We have networked the whole house, so that everyone can play
All the fantasy adventures that are popular today.
Will the boxes multitask? Well, you shouldn't even ask.
That's because we're running windows, windows, windows,
A form of software piracy.

Well I tried to boot her up, but my Pentium just died,
For the sound card is conflicting with my SCSI Fast and Wide.
I should cast her overboard to drift upon the tide.
That's the proper place for windows, windows, windows
Instead of here on my PC.

Now, there is a mighty chip, and she powers my PC.
And the name of this chip is the Pentium rev. 3.
But I fear she's been corrupted by the Redmond enemy,
And it's all because of windows, windows, windows
Eternal bane of the PC.

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this page last updated 14 June 2007
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