Jokes to share 

Last updated 24/June/00.

To laugh is sometimes the best weapon against stress. I shall try to post one article of such nature each month. Hope you enjoy and find some relax in this busy life style.

Warning

The two issues this month might stink, don't carry on reading if you are ready for supper. 

 

The following from my radio workshop supervisor (Greg) when I first landed in Canada.

A new graduate got his first job as a salesman of a hardware store. His supervisor gives him a tour of his responsible sector and a general guide on how to carry out business. "Now, you are a salesman. Your prime duty and goal is to make people to buy something from you. The trick is always to suggest extra stuffs for them to choose from. If they ask for a drill, ask them if they need drill bids. If they ask for screws, even if you run out of screws, ask them if they need screw drivers. Nine times out of ten, they either forgot something related or they thought they'll need it in future and you will make a sale. So don't be afraid to suggest for something even if you don't have the stuffs they asked for".

So the new graduate begins his day and starts looking after a section that sell power tools.

An old lady walked by and looked around the stuffs. The new graduate approaches her "Good morning, madam. Can I help you?"

The old lady said, "Oh, yes, please tell me where I can find toilet paper".

The new graduate scans around and is pretty sure there is no toilet paper in his sector. Remembering the advice given by his supervisor earlier, he tried to think of any related or similar merchandise.

"Well, madam, I don't have toilet paper here. But we do have extra quality sand paper. We have different grades to do different jobs. I'm sure I can find one that will fit your need."

 

 The following from an old friends working in HP.

"Bill, Andy, and Jerry (CEOs of MS, Int, and AM), were in a high-powered business meeting. During the serious, tense discussions, a beeping noise suddenly is emitted from where Bill is sitting.

Bill says, "Oh, that's my emergency beeper. Gentlemen, excuse me, I really need to take this call." So Bill lifts his wristwatch to his ear and begins talking into the end of his tie. After completing this call, he notices the others are staring at him. Bill explains,

"Oh, this is my new emergency communication system. I have an ear piece built into my watch and a microphone sewn into the end of my tie. That way, I can a take a call anywhere." The others nod, and the meeting continues.

Five minutes later, the discussion is again interrupted when Andy starts beeping. He also states, "Oh, that is my emergency beeper. Excuse me, gentlemen, this must be an important call." So Andy taps his earlobe and begins talking into thin air. When he completes his call, he notices the others staring at him and explains, "I also have an emergency communication system. But my ear piece is actually implanted in my earlobe, and the microphone is actually embedded in this fake tooth. Isn't that neat?"

The others nod, and the meeting continues. Five minutes later, the discussion is again interrupted when Jerry emits a thunderous fart. He looks up at the others staring at him and says, "Uhh, somebody get me a piece of paper... I'm receiving a fax."

 

How many pieces of high tech. toys you can identify from the below comet?

 

 

If you wish to share your jokes with other readers, Email me at : [email protected]

 

 

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