Get a Life

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Get A Life
lyrics © 2005 by Dr. H. Paul Shuch
sung to the tune of "My Hometown," © 2004 by Jaret Reddick of 'Bowling for Soup'

Filker's Note: When I wrote the first draft of these lyrics, they actually scanned. Thus, they sounded nothing like the original. In order to capture Bowling for Soup's distinctive style, I proceeded to cram an impossible number of syllables into single beats. If the result sounds incredibly arrhythmic and strangely familiar, I have achieved my goal.

This song goes out to all the freaks in fandom,
Especially the ones who stay up late listening to the silly songs I've made,
Who read the books and people all the panels,
Buy pictures at the art show, dress up for the masquerade.

Chorus:

I hope this song finds you well,
And I hope that you're doing really swell.
Perhaps you'll find a partner, a husband or a wife,
And maybe some day you'll wake up and get a life.

I made this verse up for all the SMOFs in fandom,
The ones who think that running things will earn them my respect,
And that if they only put on a tux and bowtie,
The fact that they're all losers is something no one will suspect.

Chorus

Let's not forget to give thanks to the authors,
With whose tales of space adventure, everyone of us identifies.
We'll keep on voting for you in the Hugos,
Even though one single original plot will be an unprecedented surprise.

Chorus

And where would we all be without the hucksters
Whose t-shirts, jewelry, tapes and books are all priced beyond belief?
I've loaded up my car with a thousand paperbacks,
And when I finally go blind from reading them in the dark, it'll probably come as a relief.

Final Chorus:

I hope this song finds you well,
And I hope that you're doing really swell.
Perhaps you'll find a partner, a husband or a wife,
And maybe some day you'll wake up and get a life.
I wish you'd try to wake up and get a life.
I'm glad I finally woke up and got a life.

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