"A dog is not "almost human," and I know of no greater insult to the canine race than to describe it as such."
"To err is human:To forgive, canine."
"In the world which we know, among the different and primitive geniuses that preside over the evolution of the several species, there exists not one, excepting that of the dog, that ever gave a thought to the presence of man."
"I talk to him when I'm lonesome like,
and I'm sure he understands.
When he looks at me so attentively,
and gently licks my hands;
Then he rubs his nose on my tailored clothes,
but I never say naught thereat,
For the good Lord knows I can buy more clothes,
but never a friend like that!"
--W. Dayton Wedgefarth
"If you can't decide between a Shepherd, a Setter or a Poodle,
get them all ... adopt a mutt!"
"Recollect that the Almighty, who gave the dog to be companion of our pleasures and our toils, hath invested him with a nature noble and incapable of deceit."
--Sir Walter Scott
"No man can be condemed for owning a dog.
As long as he has a dog, he has a friend;
and the poorer he gets, the better friend he has."
"Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies,
quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love
and always have to mix love and hate."
"The great pleasure of a dog is that you may make
a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you,
but he will make a fool of himself too."
"The disposition of noble dogs is to be gentle with people they know and the opposite with those they don't know...How, then, can the dog be anything other than a lover of learning since it defines what's its own and what's alien."
"If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience."
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend:
and inside a dog, it's too dark to read."
"Of all the things I miss from veterinary practice, puppy breath is one of the most fond memories!"
--Dr. Tom Cat
"There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face."
"If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise"
"Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant."
"Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot about puppies."
"In dog years, I'm dead."
"To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs."
"A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down."
"Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives."
"I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves."
"No animal should ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation."
-- Fran Lebowitz
"Ever consider what they must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul--chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!"
"I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult."
"My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can. That's almost $7.00 in dog money."
"If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons."
"You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person with pets."
"Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful."
"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea."
--Robert A. Heinlein
"In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him."
--Dereke Bruce, Taipei, Taiwan
"When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem."
"Cat's motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it."
"Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail."
"No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does."
"A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself."
"Man is a dog's idea of what God should be."
"The average dog is a nicer person than the average person."
--Andrew A. Rooney
"He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion."
"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man."
"Things that upset a terrier may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great Dane."
"I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts."