You Are My Router

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You Are My Router
lyrics © 2003 by Dr. H. Paul Shuch
sung to the tune of "You Are My Sunshine" by Gov. Jimmie Davis

CHORUS:

You are my router, my packet router.
You move my data from port to port.
My only terror is checksum error.
Please don't say 'quit, retry, abort'.

The other morning, I went out surfing
Highways and byways of th' World Wide Web.
Although connected, was redirected,
So I switched to dialup instead.

Chorus

I'm daisy-chaining ten hubs and straining
The whole damn network; it's way too big.
Can't make my Wi-Fi come out of standby
Without running I P CONFIG.

Chorus

Ain't got no cable to keep me stable,
No fiber optics, no shielded pair.
No RG five nine, nothin' but phone line,
So I face my blue screen and stare.

Chorus

And when my net lag approaches jet lag
Packet collisions make surfing hell.
When V dot nine two no longer will do,
Then I'll switch to ADSL.

Chorus

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