i've been debating with yourself whether or not life should come with an instruction manual, a nice index and everything, encounter a problem, flip to page 356 or whatnot... damn that'd be nice sometimes... anyway though, i think there are just some situations in which you never know how you want to act or react, or whether that response will be met with the action or reaction that you want or expect. what are we meant to do with our lives, if anything? or is our path entirely up to our choosing? do we have a choice? these are probably fairly typical questions to be asking around this time, so i apologize for the lack of ingenuity, but i still feel that they need voicing. after all, i've got to ask myself if i should be doing more with my time now, maybe try and find some meaningful relationship or something, or maybe just try and cement the ones i have... or should i get used to the fact that some of the people i know are moving off on their own path, diverging from the trail we've shared so long, stepping in and around each others' footprints and cajoling each other along as we trespassed along the narrower sections of life. it seems like that path has crumbled more often recently than it has in the past, or perhaps my perception has been altered, maybe i just didn't see the cracks before because i was always looking so far ahead, now i'm watching every step i take, but walking so much faster than i was before....