NIGHTMARES

Why do I have nightmares, night after night?

Why do I wake up with my knuckles so white?

The horrors of life come to me while I sleep

but my dreams are so real and so very deep

When I’m awake I can laugh and pretend

I can make up stories and the truth I can bend

but when I’m asleep the control goes away

The nightmares take over and my thoughts start to stray

I’ve not been a bad man. I’ve always been bold

and my dreams are less since I’m now getting old

but the dreams they do come and shake me awake

For the memories inside me I cannot forsake

I’m back in the jungle. Being beaten to death

Or I’m tied up and spat on by guards with bad breath

I feel a sharp stab in my back and warm blood

It spurts from my body in a gigantic flood

I’m hung by the neck. Stood on bottles of Coke

Each time I wobble I’m starting to choke

Day turns to night and I’m still standing there

While my entire platoon, they just stand and stare

My captors are sadists. I don’t know a thing

but pain is their pleasure, excitement to bring

They bet on the outcome. On our will to survive

Why do we bother? Is this being alive?

When we are rescued, we’re told we can’t talk

It’s the days before counselling and we can’t even walk

It must be kept secret; we should not have been there

We’ll embarrass the country. Just forget the affair

If we talk we’ll get prison, or even worse

They’ll give us some money from the government purse

but money can’t hide hurt, or give back my pride

When my memories are bottled up deep inside

My screams wake the neighbourhood

My visions of blood

I shake with fear. My bed’s wet with sweat

and all so my captor’s could lay a small bet

So tell all your children, who think war is fun

to go overseas and carry a gun

It’s not always the live one’s that come off the best

As the dead one’s are gone and we hope, are at rest

ã2005 Evad Repooc

To those who know the truth